Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as
he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.
He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed
wearing a long flowing white robe “Who the hell are you?” demanded Dave,
“and what are you doing in my bedroom?”
The mysterious man answered “This isn’t your bedroom and I’m St Peter.”
Dave was stunned “You mean I’m dead!!! That can’t be, I have so much to
live for, I haven’t said goodbye to my family. . . You’ve got to send me
back straight away.” St Peter replied “Yes, you can be reincarnated but
there is a catch.
We can only send you back as a dog or a hen.” Dave was devastated, but
knowing there was a farm not far from his house,he asked to be sent back
as a hen.
A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground. “This ain’t so bad” he thought until he felt this
strange feeling welling up inside him.
The farmyard rooster strolled over and said “So you’re the new hen, how
are you enjoying your first day here?” “It’s not so bad” replies Dave,
“but I have this strange feeling inside like I’m about to explode.”
“You’re ovulating” explained the rooster, “don’t tell me you’ve never
laid an egg before.” “Never” replies Dave .
“Well just relax and let it happen” And so he did and after a few
uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail.
An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the
better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
ever happened to him . . . Ever!!!
The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
shouting… “Dave, wake up you drunken bastard, you’ve shit the bed”
